My dearest boys,
When you guys were born many moons ago, I was super proud and super happy, like all other mothers of course. It is another issue that I was also super anxious, tentative and unsure whether I could handle not only the two tiny, squirming babies in my arms (like literally), but also my new role as a mother.
As all mothers, I wanted and prayed for the world to be at my boys’ feet. I wanted you to be the best, the smartest, the most intelligent … in short, winners all the way.
I still remember, when you two ran a race at your Kindergarten sports day, I was cheering lustily and unashamedly as both of you got off to a winning start. Somewhere along the race, I stopped cheering as you guys stopped running and turned back, the race forgotton – one to help a class-mate tie his shoe laces and the other to wait for his twin brother to catch up. I tell no lies when I admit that I was disappointed and annoyed at being cheated out of being the proud mother of at least one son if not both on the winner’s stand, that day!
In the course of your growing-up years, did I pester you, push you, badger, nag, threaten, compare and urge you on to do more and better? Yes, I did. In my weak defense, I felt a) you were blissfully unaware of your own potentials which I as your mother knew all along and b) you were not aggressive enough to go as far and as much as you were actually capable of. Again, mother knows best, right?
But you two realised long before I did that in this rat race called life, the winner’s podium is like a shimmering enticing mirage ahead, which keeps moving forward just as one thinks one has reached it. I remember when I would intentionally mention to you that so & so’s son had won something or other, your laconic reply would be – “Good for him” and you meant it sincerely too!
Fortunately for you two and me, as you have grown bigger and taller through the years, I have grown older and wiser too; I hope so anyway! Now, I am super proud and super happy that, in spite of my exaggerated expectations and desires, by the grace of God, both of you have grown into normal, confident, articulate young men who know what and how much you want out of life, and how to get it without stepping on other people’s feet.
And rather belatedly, I have realised, that there is no first, best, most … in life. It’s all so relative, right? So in every stage of life you are the sole participant, the competitor and the winner all rolled into one. So guys, participate fully and in all honesty and enjoy every moment, compete only with yourselves and win over yourselves. The only trophy to be won is growing up into fine human beings first and foremost and you two are right on track!
And along the way if you stop to tie the shoe laces of a fellow participant or simply to smell the roses, remember, this time I will be your loudest and proudest cheerleader.
Wishing the two of you a wonderful birthday and many more to come.
Your loving, and sometimes, annoying mother.