Myself Kamalamma from Kunjibettu, Karnataka.
Anybody is ever thinking some years back, that one day all children will sit at home in front of one dabba and we will call it classroom? Tchah! What to tell you? That day I am meeting our neighbour who is teacher, after long time, and I am only asking her one question, how is your online class? Maybe wrong question, because already she is going around with sad face like Meena Kumari and when she is opening her mouth and telling me so many stories of online classes, after 5 minutes Kamalamma is also hunting for hand kerchief as if I am watching Meena Kumari’s tragedy film. Abbabba! It seems online class is coming up to her neck and situation is so bad, at night when her husband is starting to snore, she is searching for mute button.
Ohoho …. now I am 100% agreeing with her that situation is bad!
It seems half morning is getting over in taking attendance; some children are in mute, some are having video off, some are playing games on chat, and sometimes parent is sitting and replying instead of child, why because child is putting head on keypad with mouth open and eyes closed. In full sleeping mode. Then one child is switching on mute button and whole class is listening to MS Subbalaxmi singing Suprabhatham in full volume. Maybe that is better than other house where parent is shouting like Arnab Goswami … so much noise and drama, because it seems child is putting full breakfast on top of laptop. Then whole class wants to know what is there for breakfast in that house! Some other children are too much smart with technology so they are giving nice moustache and rabbit ears for teacher on screen. Yebbe! Like this and all is happening in our online classes these days.
And what about parents? Ohoho … paapa parents are also having their own problems! They are saying, teachers are sitting like Buddha on other side of screen and simply giving this project and that project and who is doing all this work; parents have to do, so why they have to pay so much high fees? And some are saying schools only should pay parents for keeping their child there! Because, when all classes are anyway happening on laptop, anytime they can remove child from this class and put him in other class it seems! Abbabba! School is becoming like Amazon or Flipkart nowadays.
In the middle of all this confusion what about our children? Poor things, they are full forgetting how school and classroom is looking like, and it seems some children are even forgetting name of their school. Tchah! One member on our Whatsapp group is saying her child is crying whole day that he will join Byju class. Why? Because it seems Shahrukh Khan is teaching there. Abbabba! Now Kamalamma is full shocked. King Khan is taking new job or what? Then mother is saying no, no, he is coming in TV advertisement, so her child is thinking he is teacher there. Aiyyo … paapa SRK! What he will teach? He is still struggling with K…K…K…!
What to do, this is situation of our teachers! Full year nobody is bothering about them and suddenly on 5th September and Guru Poornima, whole country is waking up and sending images and poetry and so much nice wishes for their teachers on WhatsApp, teachers themselves are getting confused! Then they are hoping Government will also wake up and maybe increase salary little bit. Like this, our paapa teachers are getting nice dreams two days in a year.
Anyway, this year, on Guru Purnima Day, Kamalamma joins whole of India in wishing happy Teacher’s Day to Zoom and Microsoft Team and also to our teachers on WhatsApp University from whom we are learning more than in real school.
Now why to leave our new teacher Shahrukh Khan from Byju? Very happy Guru Purnima to him also from K…K…K…Kamalamma!
This post was first published on my blog The Witty Wordsmith in the Times of India, Lifestyle.