Radhika's Diaries

Looking for a humor blog? You've come to the right place!

Myself Kamalamma, from Karnataka.

What to tell! This lock down, stay home stay safe and all is looking never ending. It is like we are running and running and finally reaching finishing line in 100 meter race and then what they are doing? Taking finishing line and putting it somewhere in front! Tchah.

But what to do? It is for our own good no? There is no option. This is race for life and we have to keep running.

You people might be thinking Kamalamma is suddenly becoming philosopher or what!

But really – I am thinking too much about all people who are having no work, no food, no water, no sanitiser. How they will manage?

And now it seems everybody has to wear mask when going out. When authorities are first time making this compulsory, The Mister is going out to buy grocery items and he is coming back with big bag in hand and mask on face. How I am to know? I am thinking who is this man? I have seen him somewhere…. maybe grocery man grown little fat?Β  Then he is taking off mask and Aiyyo I am seeing it is my Mister only! Too much embarrassing situation!

Thank God Kamalamma does not have to go out. Where to get masks matching all my saris?

Anyway all work is happening through telephone nowadays, so no need to go out. But Kamalamma cannot survive without going out and talking to shopkeeper, arguing with bus conductor, bargaining with vegetable seller and all. Can’t do all this on telephone no!

First of all nobody is answering our calls these days. And if they are answering also there is no person on other side. Only some machine voice is doing all talking.

Other day Mister is telling me to call some office and abbabba, after 45 minutes I am having severe pain in ear and head. Also pain in hand and fingers.

I am dialing number and one voice is telling me to press 1 for one thing, press 2 for another thing; then 3, next 4 until all numbers from 1 to 9 are finished. Then voice is telling please hold the line and sad music is playing. After 5 minutes of this, voice is saying press * and then #….. ! Finally after doing all this, voice is suddenly coming back and telling Thank you for calling, have a good day! Then what?

Then nothing. There is total silence!

How I will have good day after all this God only knows.

Sometimes at the end of call, machine woman is saying Call will be recorded for quality purposes.

Ohohoho! This is making Kamalamma little bit happy. Finally somebody is interested in quality of my voice. Otherwise whenever I am singing in the house The Mister is laughing like Ravana in that Ramanand Sagar’s Ramayan.

Now maybe if that Himesh Rameshanna hears the quality of my voice he will invite me to recording studio. Maybe I will be next Ranu Mondial who knows!

But all this can happen only after virus goes away. Otherwise difficult to know real quality of voice. If I sing with mask on I will sound like Bollywood gangster putting kerchief on mouth and asking ransom for kidnapped victim!

I am telling Mister this but he has other important issues to worry about. He is asking who this Himesh and Ramesh Anna are!

Maybe I should tell him to press 1 for Himesh, press 2 for Ramesh, thank you for asking have a Good day!




9 thoughts on “Kamalamma and Himesh Reshammiya

  1. soniadogra says:

    I love Kamalamma. And the way you have explained the entire dialling process I’m in splits. It’s so to the point.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Sonia. πŸ˜‹πŸ˜‹


  2. Meena says:

    Himesh and Ramesh Anna! LOL

    Good one kamalamma!


  3. Guru says:

    Superb, behaviour is very close to us. πŸ˜€ thank you Radhika for bringing out this.


  4. All such mixing ups make for interesting reading. Kamalamma ki jai ho.


  5. magiceye says:

    Haha that was hilarious! Wonderful narration.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. πŸ˜‹πŸ˜‹Thank you


  6. kittysverses says:

    Lol, Ma’am. The opening lines and masks matching Kamalamma’s sarees too good. Hail, Kamalamma. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

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