Radhika's Diaries

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Q – Standing in Queues

JayPrakash Uncle loves standing in Queues!

Whenever he spots one, his legs automatically lead him to it and he joins up first; questions later. He has to be completely convinced that he has no business in that particular queue before he gets off reluctantly. And goes off in search of another!

Whenever The Aunt goes shopping, JP Uncle follows her around the different sections half-heartedly, pushing the trolley. He’s actually itching to get into the line at the till. When she’s finally down to the last 5 items in her shopping list, he shuffles off in a state of excitement to track the fastest moving queue. And joins it.

But wait – all the other lines seem to move much faster than his and The Uncle begins to get restless.

Then he spots The Aunt coming up, her arms laden with items, and he gestures to her violently almost knocking down the person in front of him.

The Aunt – “What?”

The Uncle – “You stand in that line. It’s moving faster.”

The Aunt nods and obediently joins it. The Uncle instructs the person in front of him to hold his place and shoves the trolley to The Aunt. He hurries back to his queue.

All is quiet for sometime.

Now The Uncle’s line starts moving up and he gestures to The Aunt to pass the trolley back to him. She steers it to him through the various lines, earning a few disapproving looks from other shoppers who are minding their own business in their respective queues.

However, now there’s a pause in the proceedings in his line. The person at the counter sends a request for a price check for a couple of items and everyone has to wait.

The Uncle is in a dilemma. What to do? Get out of this line and join some other?? Aah relief – his line moves up an inch and The Uncle merrily dances forward.

Now he’s almost at the counter while The Aunt still has 3 or 4 people ahead of her. Through some complicating sign language and facial contortions The Uncle conveys to The Aunt that she can get off her queue. She does so and comes over to join him.

But, now this line stops moving! The billing machine has run out of paper and the female behind it has no clue how to insert a fresh roll. The Manager is called for and everyone has to wait.

The Uncle watches restlessly and helplessly as the queues at the other counters move on at super fast speed. Such agony!!!

In the meanwhile one fat lady is trying to edge surreptitiously past him to beat the queue. The Uncle is usually a courteous and chivalrous man – except when he’s in a hard-earned slot in a Queue. He sharply elbows her out and gives her a stern look!

Finally everything appears to be sorted out at the counter and The Uncle sighs in relief as the queue moves up. And ……… Voila!! It’s now The Uncle’s turn!! He pays up for all the shopping they’ve done and instructs the girl at the counter “No plastic bags please! We have our own cloth bags.”

At last JP Uncle and The Aunt are out in the fresh air and wide open spaces.

The Uncle suddenly spots another Queue a little ahead.

He tells The Aunt, “You go ahead. I’ll just find out what that queue is for!”

The Aunt gives him an exasperated look and pulls him back. “That Queue is for going into the shop!! Can’t you see the sign above it???”

The Uncle looks at the sign board. It says “ENTRANCE.”

x ———————— x

This is the 17th in the series The Adventures of The JP Family as part of the A to Z Blog Challenge.

Alphabet Illustration – Sudarshan Rao

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13 thoughts on “Q – Queues.

  1. Ruchi says:

    Ah! Reminded of my husband at the quintessential busy LULU on Friday(hope you will understand this in context of Dubai) . He hardly let me shop vegetables and secured the place in queue.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahaha! That’s exactly what meant!! 😉😀

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Neeraja Rao says:

    Uproariously funny!

    The best in the series so far

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Meena says:

    Haha! I do this when I shopping for clothes with my daughters! I’m successful most of the time!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahahaha!! Good for you Meena. You must have mastered the art then!! 🙂 🙂

      Like

      1. Meena says:

        Yeah! The trick is not the leave either queue till the very last!😂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. 😁😁 That’s smart Meena. You’re a pro !!

        Like

  4. soniadogra says:

    I must tell you we have a family reading of your pieces everyday after dinner!! Both my children and my husband are big fans of JP Uncle!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. OMG!! You don’t say!!! I am feeling so good Sonia. Thank you Thank you thank you!!! 😍😍😍

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Deepa says:

    This is hilarious Radhika. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you Deepa!! 😍

      Like

  6. samira0894 says:

    Too good…

    Like

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